BailOut

Bail Out (1989)

Holy crap David Hasselhoff is in this movie! That is the first thing that I wrote when taking notes while watching this odd little movie. Then I saw that Linda Blair and John Vernon were also in the movie and I started to have some faint hopes that it wasn’t going to be too bad. I was right in hoping it wasn’t going to be too bad, kind of.

So the movie opens up with a foul-mouthed bail bondsman going to work and insulting everyone around him. Thru him we are introduced to three bounty hunters that freelance for him. They insure that his clients actually show up for court and don’t cost him any money. Hasselhoff plays the smooth one, W.B., who drives around in a sporty Chrysler convertible (it was the 80s). His sidekicks are an ex football star named Blue and a Hispanic guy named Bean, who has dozens of kids it seems. Yeah that is what passes for humor here. All three get involved in tracking down an Heiress (Blair) who gets kidnapped by drug dealers as soon as she is released from jail. The three bounty hunters go off to saver her and get her to court on time for a big pay day, even if it means having to tangle with the drug dealers and their arsenal!

This is a generic action movie from the 80s that is only interesting because of the cast. Hasselhoff brings his normal acting skills to the movie, which means he is the same character he played in Baywatch and Nightrider. Say what you want but he has gotten along pretty far without being much of an actor. The rest of the cast is mediocre, including Blair who phones another performance in. Vernon is wasted in a small role and Danny Trejo has a bit part. Like I’ve already stated the story is very generic and nothing special. The action sequences are pretty lame and the attempts at humor revolve mostly around the Bean character and are kind of lame. When the character that is supposed to be the funny one has the catchphrase “May the bird of Paradise fly up your nose”, only with several variations you know they were reaching. There is even the typical “cool” action ending that leaves the story up for some sequels that thankfully never were made.

The filmmakers did have some money to spend on the movie. Though to be honest it does have that TV movie of the week feel to it, so I’m not sure how big the budget was. Still the camera work, sound, lighting, and editing all point to some cash and talent behind the scenes. Too bad they didn’t spend any money on a writer. The big conflict at the end is choreographed poorly and reminded me of an A-Team episode in the amount of lead being shot at the heroes without a scratch on any of them.

This isn’t a terrible movie and might be interesting to watch once if you are a fan of the Hoff or just like bad 80s action movies. But in the end this is a really poor effort and fails to be entertaining. This movie is available from Mill Creek on their budget DVD sets. Check them out at http://www.millcreekent.com/ for more information.

1 ½ out of 4

reviewed by John Shatzer